- A karmic relationship often starts to break down with boundary issues like jealousy or controlling tendencies as you begin to notice your partner’s flaws.
- The relationship progresses with frequent drama and circular fights, which are all typically about the same things.
- Late-stage karmic relationships are marked with emotional exhaustion, codependency, addictions, and fears about ending the relationship.
Signs the Relationship is Ending
The attraction feels too good to be true. You and your karmic partner hit it off right away. Or sometimes, even before you meet—you just get the feeling that someone meant for you will arrive soon. And things seem great at the start. Too great. Truth is, you were meant for each other, but not for forever. Karmic relationships tend to be short, which is why this sign, which comes early in a relationship, can also be a sign that the relationship won’t pan out (not the way you want it to, at least).
You ignore the red flags. You trust your intuition, and in the past you’ve bailed on potential partners that didn’t seem to fit the bill. For some reason, though, you’re overlooking this person’s red flags; you’ve decided that this person’s faults are worth your strong connection. It’s not necessarily your fault for overlooking the signs—there are greater forces bringing the two of you together, after all.
Your partner starts to have boundary issues. Bit by bit, your partner starts to control your daily life. They don’t want you to spend time without them or they object to your friends. They also dictate more significant decisions, like financial choices. You start to feel less like an individual and more like a child or a dependent. In addition, your partner often prioritizes their own wants and needs over yours. You feel like you have little say in how the two of you spend your time.
You can’t communicate clearly. At the start, you were always on the same page, and even seemed to read each other's thoughts. Now, you and your partner tend to talk past each other, or you say one thing and mean another. Somewhere along the line, your words stopped mattering as much as they used to.
You fight more often than not. At some point, your go-to pastime became bickering. Relationship quarrels are easy when the two of you are so alike; you know how to press the right buttons and get a rise out of each other. Sometimes, these fights feel more obligatory, like you’re not sure what else you’d be doing if you weren’t bickering. Some people think you fight with your karmic partner because you feel wrongs from your past life come to the surface, creating reasons to bicker that you feel you can’t explain, since those reasons didn’t originate in your current life.
You repeatedly break up and get back together. Karmic relationships present many sorts of patterns, and one such pattern is a cycle of splitting and reuniting. The relationship ends when one of you can’t take it anymore, but you also feel like you can’t live without them, so you make up and try to make it work. It may be that your relationship hasn’t yet fulfilled its karmic purpose, or you haven’t learned the lesson it was sent to teach you. That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try to exit the relationship anyway.
You drop everything to help your partner. It’s classic codependence. You rush to your partner’s aid, even when helping them comes at your own detriment. You feel a strange compulsion to sort out their problems for them, and they feel the same for you. But this codependence isn’t sustainable, and sooner or later it’ll come to a breaking point, where you feel you can’t keep coming to their rescue. If you feel your codependence is overwhelming, take steps to end the relationship. Express your worries clearly, and stand firm in your decision to leave.
There’s addiction in the relationship. Alcohol, drugs, sex. Whatever it is, you enable each other’s worst behaviors, making self-destruction easier than it’d be if you weren’t together. In many ways, you feel as though you’re also addicted to each other—it’s not a healthy relationship, but you just can’t quit. If you or your partner have a damaging addiction, make steps to overcome it by visiting a counselor or an addiction support group.
You don’t feel safe around your partner. Abuse comes in many forms, verbal or physical. And when you’re as close as you are to your karmic partner, it becomes all too easy to overlook or ignore. But lately, you feel uncomfortable or even unsafe in your partner’s presence. If you feel this way, talk to a trusted friend or family member, and make moves to exit the relationship as soon as possible. While your karmic contract may be with this person, it doesn’t mean allowing yourself to be abused. Learn to recognize the signs of an abusive relationship. These include physical, verbal, or sexual assaults, but may also be more subtle, such as emotional manipulation.
You start to notice the worst parts of yourself. Your partner is your karmic mirror, after all. Even as they bring out the best in you, they also bring out the worst, to the point where you can’t overlook your own bad behavior. This is often the start of your own introspection; the relationship has begun to reveal the karmic issues you need to resolve. Take note of these issues by writing them down. Externalizing and embracing your flaws can help you make sense of your own negative behavioral patterns and start planning ways to break the cycle.
The drama becomes too much to handle. Eventually, you grow tired of the relationship rollercoaster. Being with your partner is still rewarding, but you wonder if it’s worth the effort. As much as you love them, you think it might be easier for the both of your to call the whole thing off. This is often the first sign you’ll separate for good. You’re beginning to understand the karmic patterns and recognize that your relationship isn’t meant to be.
You’re afraid of exiting the relationship. As hard as the relationship has become, you find the thought of calling things off as hard as the thought of keeping things going. That’s because this relationship is cyclical—you may not find a clear way out until you’ve identified your own karmic problems and resolved to become better. Talk to a close friend about how you feel. Often, an outside perspective is crucial to putting an end to destructive cycles.
Stages of a Karmic Relationship
You get the feeling you’re about to meet someone important. Either just before or just after meeting your karmic partner, your intuition will tell you that there’s about to be a significant shift. It comes as a gut feeling, or a sudden elevated mood. Pay attention to that feeling, and be on the lookout for the person who’ll help you on your karmic journey. Even as you feel excited, you also feel a sense of foreboding. After all, karmic relationships are destined to end—this person isn’t your forever person.
You have an immediate connection to your partner. Once you do connect with your karmic partner, it feels like the universe dropped them right in front of you like a gift. And that’s true! This person will help you discover more about yourself, as well as sort out shortcomings from your past lives. It might also feel like déjà vu, or like you’ve met this person before. In a sense, you have, just not in this life.
The relationship becomes unbalanced or one-sided. At the start, things are peachy. You understand each other, and seem to always be on the same wavelength. You help them, and they help you. But then you start to help them a little more than they help you. Your intuition tells you that while this relationship will be beneficial for now, it may not be easy, and won’t last. Don’t ignore this feeling— follow your intuition where it leads you. Keep a journal to track these feelings so that you can recognize the patterns in your emotions later.
You start to have frequent drama or intense fights. Eventually, that initial feeling that something’s missing develops into a rift between you and your karmic partner. You start to bicker, or jealousy leads you to other romantic interests. It feels like your relationship is turbulent more often than not. These arguments start small, but tend to add up. Avoid toxic arguments by asking yourself if the cause matters, in the grand scheme of things, or if it’s over something you don’t actually feel strongly about. Also pay attention to these arguments. They may arise because of behavioral problems the karmic relationship came to address. Now’s the time to start working to better yourself.
The patterns of negative behavior start to repeat. You seem to have the same argument over and over. Or your partner refuses to change their ways. In addition, you keep making the same mistakes, even when you know which mistakes to avoid. It’s frustrating, but this is the universe telling you loud and clear, “Here’s the problem!” While you and your karmic partner are in this to better yourselves, remember that you can’t force someone to change their own behavior. This is a time to work on yourself.
Your own insecurities intensify. You’ve recognized the patterns, but you feel helpless to fix them. And then you start to question if you’ll ever be able to do it. You can, though, you just haven’t figured out how. Start thinking about the exiting the relationship, which will help you get the distance you need. In the meantime, work to break your bad habits. Any time you recognize yourself falling into a negative pattern, redirect it by doing something positive, like exercising or calling a friend.
You become overly dependent on each other. You were placed in this relationship to help each other, but now you feel like helping your partner is no longer sustainable. You sacrifice your time, energy, and even money when they’re in need, but you don’t feel like the cost was worth it. The relationship is running out of steam.
You grow weary of the relationship. Finally, it seems like the relationship has run its course. You’ve learned all you needed to learn about your karmic growth, and your partner is no longer helping you break the cycle. At this point, the only way out appears to be ending the relationship. Don’t ignore that feeling. You may feel angry toward your partner, but remember that you were both placed in the relationship for the same reasons. Rather than lashing out, resolve to make a clean break and move on.
You or your partner decide to end the relationship. The parting may be mutual. Or, one of you may want to end it, but the other doesn’t feel ready. But the relationship has run its course, and there’s no point staying when there’s nothing left to learn. Remember, this relationship was never meant to stick. Before you end the relationship, try to make sure you have somewhere to go or a friend to fall back on. A soft landing will help you get back on your feet. Hold your ground if your partner tries to convince you to stay. If it makes you more comfortable, have a trusted friend present or nearby. Remove your ex from your contacts, and block them on social media. The relationship served its purpose, but not it’s time to move on.
Moving On From a Karmic Relationship
Get some physical and emotional distance. In order to break the cycle, you need to step outside of it. Stay with a close friend or family member, or just anywhere you can clear your mind, away from your partner. Then, distract yourself with your favorite activities. Go out in the evening, make art, exercise; whatever helps you take your mind off your relationship. In addition, help yourself move on by journaling about your experiences or confiding in a friend. Getting it out of your system will help you keep it out of your system. Reader Poll: We asked 278 wikiHow readers who've ended a karmic relationship, and 51% of them agreed that the experience was sad because they still loved their partner despite the challenges. [Take Poll] So if you're feeling down, you're not alone in that.
Let go of your resentments. Remember that it takes 2 to tango, and it takes 2 to fulfill a karmic relationship. You and your partner both made mistakes, but holding onto those resentments—about your partner and yourself—only serves to keep the cycle going. Forgive yourself and remember that your relationship was a learning opportunity. Take advantage of that opportunity, and resolve to move forward. Forgive your partner by keeping in mind that the relationship served to make them a better person, too.
Examine your own negative patterns and behaviors. Once you have some distance, look inside yourself. Ask yourself what mistakes you made in the relationship, and how you can avoid those mistakes in the future. It’s up to you to make the most of your experience as you can. For example, if you feel you were overly controlling in the relationship, resolve to let your next partner have more freedom and privacy. In addition, see a therapist or a counselor. A professional can help you identify your destructive habits and take action to fix them.
Karmic vs. Twin Flame vs. Soulmate Relationships
Karmic relationship A karmic relationship is one that the universe places you in so that you can identify your shortcomings or faults. These shortcomings may be from this life or a past life, but they’re always persistent. Your partner, too, may be from a past life. Your karmic partner is a mirror of yourself. They reflect both your good and your bad sides, helping you identify both your strengths and weaknesses. While a karmic relationship might at first feel like forever, or like you and your partner are soulmates, it’s a relationship destined to end.
Twin flame relationship Your twin flame is similar to a karmic partner, except that there’s only 1 of them. In addition, while a karmic relationship is rocky, your twin flame nurtures you in a harmonious and productive way. You share a spirit, and together you’ll work to foster and grow that spirit to become the best you can be. Often, once you find and recognize each other, you and your twin flame are bonded forever. Twin flame relationships are often sexual, and this sexual aspect also contributes to your growth.
Soulmate relationship You can have more than 1 soulmate, and your relationships with soulmates can be sexual or nonsexual. You have separate spirits, but share an energy. While soulmates may not be forever, they often only get better with time, with each soulmate you find deepening and nurturing your understanding of each other. Unlike karmic relationships, which are a sort of trial by fire, soulmates work to better you as a person without many of the rocky aspects.
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