How to Fake Your Period
How to Fake Your Period
Every person has their own biological clock. If you haven't yet started your period, try not to worry. Ask a parent or a trusted adult to help you get a better idea of what to expect. If you want to fake getting your period to get out of gym class, start by learning the other physical signs of getting your period.
Steps

Demonstrating Convincing Signs of a Period

Complain of swelling in your breasts. One of the signs of getting your period is that your breasts may swell. They may feel heavier than usual, or become painful to touch. The changing hormones in your body affect your breasts during your period. Usually this swelling occurs before your period. If you're faking being on your period, you might complain about the way your breasts ached a few days earlier.

Explain that you're bloated. Many people experience a sense of being puffy and bloated around the time of their periods. When you're on your period, your body will naturally retain more water. Some signs of being bloated are puffiness around your middle. You might complain that your clothes feel tight, and that your jeans are hard to close. You might say that you feel full, and don't feel like eating. Usually the bloating is done by the 3rd day of your period, so don't go on too long with your pretense.

Pretend to have mood swings. Hormones that come with your period can have an extreme effect on your mood, causing you to dive into sullen depression for no apparent reason. If you want to fake being on your period, pretend to be moody. Other symptoms are feeling uncharacteristically anxious, irritable, or confused. Don't overdo it! You don't want your parents to be so worried about your mood that they take you to the doctor.

Complain about menstrual cramps. Menstrual cramps happen in your abdominal area, and are caused by the muscles of the uterus contracting. The contracting uterus pushes the blood out, causing the visible signs of a period. If you are faking your period, talk about the pain of the cramps. Your pretend cramps might feel either sharp and stabbing, or just like a dull ache. It's not a good idea to take medication, since you're not really experiencing pain. Instead, just explain that you need to rest. You might gently massage your abdomen, explaining that this helps the cramps.

Talk about lower back pain. During your period, your lower back may start to ache. This is due to the same menstrual cramping that causes feelings of pain in the abdomen. Pain in your lower back due to your period is usually a dull achy feeling. Again, it's still not a good idea to take medication, since you're not really in pain. However, it won't hurt you to put a hot compress on your back if someone insists you do something to feel better. Other things that you can suggest include taking a hot bath, or resting. These are recommended treatments for lower back cramps.

Talk to someone. There's nothing wrong with faking your period, but it might not solve the real problem you have. Talking to an older person might be helpful, and you might be able to solve your problem in another way. For example, if you feel like you need to fake your period to impress your friends, it's possible that you don't have strong friendships. A real friend accepts you just as you are. If you are faking your period to get out of gym class, talking with someone can help you figure out what it is about this class that is so dreadful that you have to lie to get out of it. Is the teacher unprofessional? Do you feel uncomfortable or self-conscious doing the gym activities? Talking with someone you trust about this situation may help you figure out what's really going on.

Knowing When Your Period Might Start

Ask your mom when her own period started. If you're faking your period because your friends have all started, you probably want to know when your own is likely to start. One way to find out is to ask your mom, because many times your own biological clock will be similar. If your mom started her period at the age of 12, your own period is likely start within a year of your 12th birthday. You might start to get your period as young as 8 or 9, or you might be as old as 16.

Look for your breasts to develop. Your period usually will start within 2 years of the time your breasts buds appear. This means that your nipples will become raised, no longer laying flat on the surface of your chest. The breast buds appear because of fat, tissue and milk ducts growing beneath the nipples, in preparation for providing milk to a newborn child. Your breasts can take from 1-4 years to grow into a rounded, adult shape from the time your breast buds appear.

Notice the growth of pubic hair. Usually the hair that appears below your lower stomach and between your legs is soft and light at first. Then, over time, it will grow darker and curlier. Your period will usually start between 1-2 years from the time your pubic hair starts to grow. Some adult women choose to shave their pubic hair, but this isn't usually recommended for young girls because this is such a sensitive region.

Check your armpits for hair. Like the hairs in your pubic area, your underarm hairs might seem light and soft at first, before growing darker and curly. You'll probably notice pubic hair growing first, and then hair beneath your arms. Many girls choose to shave these hairs off with a razor. There are no health reasons to do this, however, so it's up to you to decide what you prefer. Underarm hair usually comes towards the end of puberty.

Notice some vaginal discharge. If you notice yellow or white stains on your underpants, this is likely a natural fluid that helps your vagina stay clean and moist. You will most likely get your period within a year of noticing signs of discharge. The discharge should not smell bad. If you have itching, or if the discharge is foul-smelling, you might have an infection and need to see a doctor.

Observe changes in your complexion. Most teens and preteens start to notice oilier patches of skin around their face, due to hormonal changes in their bodies. Pimples and acne might also appear on your skin. Make sure you're washing your face at least once daily with gentle soap and warm water. Don't scrub it, or you may cause scarring. Your doctor may prescribe treatment for acne if it's bad enough.

Prepare an emergency kit for your first period. Because no one knows exactly when they'll get their first period, it's a good idea to prepare a kit to keep with you just in case it comes. An emergency kit should contain everything that you need to take care of your menstrual flow when it arrives, including a small pantyliner, a pad, and a pair of clean underwear. Having a kit will also be handy if you want to fake having a period, because other people can see that you're prepared. If you don't have your emergency kit when you get your first period, putting some toilet paper in the crotch of your underwear can serve as a temporary fix until you can get a real pad. A school nurse or clinic will usually have free pads that you can use. Some public restrooms have dispenser to sell single pads or tampons.

Ask an older person for help. If you're trying to figure out more about what having a period is like, ask an older person who you trust. This might be a parent, an aunt, a teacher, or even an older sibling or friend. Even though conversations about private subjects like periods aren't common, the truth is that many people have gone through the process of getting their period. They'll probably be happy to talk with you about it. If you're not sure how to start the conversation, consider saying something like, "Can I ask you about something? I am wondering about getting my period...." Make sure you're asking them at a time when you have some privacy, and when you're not rushing to go somewhere else.

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