What Does Nebularomantic Mean? All Your Questions Answered

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posted on 6 months ago — updated on 1 second ago

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While searching for a label that fits your romantic orientation, you’ve stumbled across the term nebularomantic—but what does it mean? In short, it describes people who can’t tell the difference between romantic and platonic attraction because they’re neurodivergent. In this article, we’ll give you a complete overview of what it means to be nebularomantic and how to tell if the term might apply to you, too!

Things You Should Know

Nebularomantic people struggle to distinguish romantic and platonic attraction specifically because they’re neurodivergent.
Nebularomantic only applies to neurodivergent people; if you’re neurotypical, a label like quoiromantic or platoniromantic might fit better.
The term “nebularomantic” most likely originated on Tumblr in 2014 and the nebularomantic flag was created by color-picking from a photo of a nebula.

Nebularomantic Meaning

Nebularomantic people can’t distinguish romantic and platonic attraction. “Nebularomantic” is a neurosexuality specific to neurodiverse individuals, and it falls on the aromantic spectrum. It’s a label for people who have difficulty telling the difference between romantic and platonic attraction specifically due to their neurodivergence (or can’t tell the difference at all). Some choose not to label their romantic orientation this way, while others feel it helps them communicate their confusion when it comes to attraction. Remember: nebularomanticism is specific to neurodivergent individuals. If you can’t differentiate between types of attraction but are neurotypical, a different label (like quoiromantic or platoniromantic) could apply to you.

History of the Nebularomantic Orientation

The idea of a nebularomantic orientation was likely coined in 2014. While there isn’t a definitive history for nebularomantic, it seems to have originated on Tumblr, a social networking and blogging platform. Tumblr user can-i-hide-in-you introduced the nebularomantic flag in August 2014 and cited Tumblr user space-revolutionary for having coined the term. Ultimately, it’s hard to say for certain where the term nebularomantic comes from, but it gained popularity between 2015 and 2019 after its introduction on Tumblr. The term “nebularomantic” likely comes from the word “nebulous,” which means clouded or unclear. It’s also a contraction of the word “nebula,” which is a giant cloud of dust and gas in space. Thus, “nebularomantic” likely refers to a nebularomantic person’s judgment feeling clouded when trying to differentiate between types of attraction.

Nebularomantic Flag & Color Meanings

The nebularomantic flag was designed with the colors of a nebula. As mentioned above, the flag itself was designed by Tumblr user can-i-hide-in-you in 2014. The colors of the flag, however, don’t have a specific meaning beyond being chosen by color-picking from a photo of a nebula. Thus, the flag reflects a nebula’s overall color scheme.

How to Tell if You’re Nebularomantic

Verify that you have a condition classified as neurodivergent first. “Neurodivergent” is a term that describes anyone whose mental differences affect how their brain works, giving them different strengths and challenges than neurotypical people. So, ask yourself if a medical professional has diagnosed you with a condition linked to neurodivergence. Conditions include: Autism Attention Deficit / Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) Anxiety Bipolar Disorder Depression Dyslexia Dyspraxia Hyperlexia Tourette's Syndrome Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) Synesthesia

Ask yourself if the nebularomantic label fits you. Do you struggle to differentiate between romantic and platonic attraction? If the answer is “yes” and you’re definitely neurodivergent, you could absolutely use “nebularomantic” to label your romantic orientation. However, you’re also not obligated to use labels if you don’t want to! Remember, it’s important to get an official diagnosis, even if you already feel like you might have a neurodivergent condition. Neurodivergent people who identify as nebularomantic may also be offended if you use the term without actually being neurodivergent yourself.

Are there nebularomantic pronouns?

There are no pronouns specific to nebularomantic people. Nebularomantic is a romantic orientation, not a gender orientation. Therefore, anyone who identifies as nebularomantic uses the pronouns that feel comfortable to them. It’s always best to ask people (whether they’re nebularomantic or not) on a case-by-case basis if they have preferred pronouns.

Related Terms

Consider whether a label similar to nebularomantic may fit you better. If you feel like “nebularomantic” is a fitting label for your romantic orientation, that’s great! If you feel like something else might fit better, consider the following related terms: Nebulasexual. This label simply describes someone who can’t differentiate between sexual attraction and other types of attraction (as opposed to romantic). Nebularoace. Nebularoace refers to someone who identifies as both nebularomantic and nebulasexual. Quoiromantic. This is a broad term for people who don’t understand or experience romantic attraction the way most do. For example, it can mean feeling confused by romantic attraction or experiencing it in a different way. Platoniromantic. This is a subcategory of quoiromantic referring to people who don’t understand the distinction between platonic and romantic attraction and don’t experience the two separately. Nebulous attraction. Nebulous attraction is experienced by people who can’t distinguish between types of attraction; it can include any attraction type, but not necessarily all of them (from sexual attraction to romantic, platonic, aesthetic, or mental attraction and more).