Mandira Bedi Opens Up On Coping With Husband Raj Kaushal's Death: 'I’ll Always Grieve Him'

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posted on 6 months ago — updated on 1 second ago

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Mandira Bedi shared that the first year after Raj's death was the hardest, with painful milestones like birthdays and anniversaries.

Mandira Bedi recently spoke about losing her husband Raj Kaushal for the first time since his passing in June 2021. It took her three years to gather the courage to discuss her grief publicly. Initially, she said, she couldn’t talk about him without crying, but now she can reflect on what he meant to her and their children. In an interview with Humans of Bombay, Mandira shared that the first year after Raj’s death was the hardest, with painful milestones like birthdays and anniversaries. However, she mentioned that subsequent years have been somewhat easier as they continue to remember him every day.

She said, “The only way out is through. Of course, my children and I think of him every day. It’s not like we’ve forgotten him. The first year was very, very, very, very hard. The first of everything is just impossible to deal with. The first birthday, the first anniversary, the first Diwali, the first Christmas, the first New Year. The second one is a little bit easier, the third one is a little bit easier…”

Mandira Bedi mentioned she’s still growing emotionally. Initially, she coped with the loss by immersing herself in work. She said, “There are moments when we remember him because of a song. I’ve done the therapy I’ve needed to, there are times I still do it. As human beings, we are always a work in progress… What I can do now is talk about it. It makes me emotional, but I can. There was a time I couldn’t. But I won’t break down… I started working two months after it happened… I have to support my family and myself. I need to do it for my children.”

Mandira admitted she still finds some things difficult. She added, “It’s been six years that I’ve had his car. And I have to sell it now. I’d been holding onto it for emotional reasons, and now I’m going to shed a tear when it goes. So, it’s a work in progress. I’ve dealt with the bulk of it, but for the rest of my life, I’ll always grieve him. One thing I still can’t do, is that I can’t listen to Kishore Kumar music.”

Raj Kaushal died of a heart attack at the age of 50.